mazirian - Who the Hell Is Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff

[Hot off the neurons, with explanation here at audiodramatalk, and with apologies to Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff, whoever he is:] I dreamed that there was a horrendous rumbling noise all about my house: sort of like the San Andreas fault ripping a new one mixed with a fireworks display and crashing surf. [Upon waking this was revealed to have been a malfunctioning baby toy that my cat activated in the middle of the night.] I was alone in bed and immediately began to wonder where Stephanie was. I found her in the bathroom where she had taken our daughter's pink "bubble fruit" toothpaste and squirted it into some sort of esoteric symbol on the floor of the bathtub. Our daughter's rubber duckies were positioned at presumably significant locations in the symbol. Needless to say it was a disturbing sight.

"What the hell are you doing!?"

"I'm summoning him," she yelled over the roaring noise.

"Who!?"

"Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff!"

"Who the hell is Mark Yoshi—" I yelled as I chased her through the house to the living room "—moto Nemcoff!?"  By this time we had reached the backyard, where a tremendous helicopter had landed: it had four whirly twirly rotors set above a large flying saucer like body; a gangway had been lowered onto and completely crushed my favourite lawn chair.

"He's taking me away, Brad," she yelled over the roar of the helicopter's swooshing blades.

"Who is taking you where!?"

"Mark Fucking Yoshimoto Nemcoff!"

"Right, who the fuck is that! That's what I've been asking!"

"He's going to make sure that Fox never produces another show like Fringe ever again!" [We don't watch much TV, honestly, but we did recently suffer through an episode of this bit of Fox's propaganda campaign against science and reason and good dialogue.]

[There was more, but, much like the above, it isn't worth bothering you with.]